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Most people in recovery struggle to define all of the 'no's'- the things that they need to be aware of, stay away from or give up in order to maintain sanity and strong recovery.  In this episode, Jackie and Jon discuss the 3 Circles method for sexual sobriety and make a case for the importance of focusing on 'yes' in recovery.  

 

This concept comes from the 12-step fellowship SAA.  You can read their source material here: https://saa-recovery.org/literature/abstinence/

We have Kelly McDaniel back on to talk about her take on I, Tonya - the recent film starring Margot Robbie and Allison Janney depicting the story of Olympic Figure Skater Tonya Harding.  Kelly talks about toxic love, mother wounds, perfectionism, patriarchy and many other forces that shape the broken hearts of girls with cruel mothers.

 

Resources mentioned in this episode:

 

Kelly's blog post on Cruel Mothers https://kellymcdanieltherapy.com/legacy-maternal-cruelty-tonya/

 

Books by Peg Streep- Daughter Detox: Recovering from An Unloving Mother and Reclaiming Your Life and Mean Mothers: Overcoming the Legacy of Hurt

Jackie and Jon share some stories from their lives and insights with each other in this installment.  You will hear stories like "the Dishwasher," "Take the Shot," "Vomit I,"  "Vomit II," and "Childbirth is Hard for Men."  Get cozy and settle in- let us tell you a good story.

Jackie and Jon continue the series on families and the things that impact how we relate and interact with one another.  Every family is part of a larger cultural context which influences attitudes, beliefs, and relationships within that family.  We talk about current cultural traumas like sexual assault and misconduct and mass shootings.

Jon and Jackie add another part to their series on family of origin and how we are shaped by the people we grow up with.  In this episode, we explore how the seemingly small things can add up to have a big impact- positively and negatively.  Listen to learn how you can become more resilient to "little t" traumas.

Jackie and Jon continue their series on Family of Origin by exploring what didn't happen- or neglect.  Neglect comes in all shapes and sizes, on an extreme end, it is very noticeable.  For many of us, it is less noticeable but still leaves painful scars.  We explore different forms of neglect, the ways it shows up in adulthood, and the messages we internalize when what is isn't enough.

Jackie and Jon start a new series on Family of Origin and its impacts on you.  So much happens immediately and subtly within families that shapes how we feel, who we are, and the relationships we seek out.

*This episode is marked explicit because it does contain references to human sexuality and words that some might find offensive- we find that the material is still relevant to our audience and sometimes these topics are best served in frank, adult conversations*

 

Jon and Jackie welcome Rob Weiss (@robweissmsw) to the podcast.  Rob is an accomplished author, therapist, and advocate for sex addicts in recovery.  Today we talk to Rob about his newest book Out of the Dog House: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating.  Our conversation explores the experience of the spouse who has been cheated on as well as the experience of the person who has done the cheating including what happens for both at discovery/disclosure, initial steps to take for stabilization, and changes and growth that can happen in a relationship post-infidelity.

 

You can find Rob at www.robertweissmsw.com

 

We sit down with Deb Kaplan, author of "For Love and Money: Exploring Sexual and Financial Betrayal in Relationships" and a leading expert in issues related to sex and money.  Few people can break down these big, difficult issues like Deb can to help individuals and couples come out from under the stifling beliefs about sex and money.

 

Deb's website is www.debrakaplancounseling.com, and you can get her book here: http://debrakaplancounseling.com/book-for-love-and-money/  you can reach her directly at info@debrakaplancounseling.com

 

Deb also mentioned a series of articles in the New Yorker by Ronan Farrow- you can link to those articles here:

https://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/from-aggressive-overtures-to-sexual-assault-harvey-weinsteins-accusers-tell-their-stories 

https://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/harvey-weinsteins-army-of-spies 

https://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/harvey-weinsteins-secret-settlements 

 

Jon and Jackie revisit their last solo show- where they started talking about sexism and each of our roles in continuing the conversation about it.  Jackie and Jon share personal stories and experiences that highlight how ingrained those ways of thinking and acting are.  It's all around us- like water to a fish.